Lauriel de Heroux

Et demain toi et moi serons partis.

About

Below are the accounts of the past as they would have been scribbled down by Lauriel.To most people of his past and immediate circle, he is known as Heron as he does not go by his birth name often. Until recently the Inquisition of Ishgard used to hold most of his criminal record. However, Lord Ovont de Durendaire destroyed a bulk of it.For someone just digging into Lauriel's past, it would be hard to distinguish fact from fiction and unbiased rumors.These days he is often seen in the company of a tall Xaela with four horns and a rather long tail. It is no secret among those who know Lauriel, that they share a bond that goes beyond affection.Lauriel is a storyteller, someone who does not easily talk about who he really is. He hides behind his stories, he lies about his past and what he feels and thinks at times. Anyone interacting with him should take most things he says with a pinch of salt.Things to note:Smokes too much
Has heterochromia and his eyes are more luminous than should be normal
Two scars on his face, both look like they've been cut with a sharp blade
Freckles mostly on his face, but some on his shoulders and other hidden places
Permafrown

Twenty years ago...

There's nothing the world hasn't taken from me.
So I dream.
When my waking eyes stare into that face decayed with death
I can't help but feel the cold void of nothing gape where my fear should be.

Over ten years ago...

My name is Lauriel de Heroux, as I write these lines the cold encroaches on my position and the flames of the dying fire are not enough to keep me warm for long. I have eaten the last grain several suns ago and while I was ready for the afterlife less than a fortnight ago, the will to live has become stronger than my weakness and the hunger. Stranger, if you read these lines, know that I lived a life of duty in service of Halone and my people and I am aware that this may be my shameful end. Thus, should you be more honourable than me and more durable against cold and foe that lie outside this cave, I plead for you to carry this letter, my possibly last words to my family. Let them know that if they can find it in their heart to forgive me one day I will be returning. I promise on my waning honour that I shall make this right.

Unsorted scribbles, time unkown....

Lies and lies and lies, feed me on them 'till I burst, and when there's nothing left of me, patch me up and do it all again, I dare you.

I have a lot to apologize for and yet many moons have passed since I've done so. Almost as if the heart grows cold when there's no one to warm it. The frost I thought I've left behind has just festered inside of me now.

Blue eyes, red hair... smelled of leather and sleep in the morning. Don't forget why.

You know what I meant even though I never said it. There is only so much I can take from you. Have you ever stopped to ask me what I want? Has anyone ever? You look at me as if I owe you, you are used to people owing you. If we continue it will be on my terms, I will make sure of that.I owe you nothing but my life.

For all the dark thoughts, I am certain happiness will find me someday again, perhaps choke me out when I least expect it. Like a pleasant punch in the face. At least... that's my hope.

Remember dreams? That state where the lines between what's real and what's horrific apparition. It is then I can feel something akin to terror. A slight tingle, a flutter in the chest, but with the first light of dawn it is gone. Leaving me to make due with the void.

Father, Mother, Fabienne my darling sister what fate will await you that'll be your undoing?

I see you now, I have not seen you before, but I do now. I was taught you were mere beasts, I was told that you are better left dead than alive. Never I would have thought that you feel. I know that asking for forgiveness is too little to late. The Chocobo's feathers have been rustled now and I deserve your anger.

I could not believe it when I heard it first, I could not grasp it when I saw it with my own eyes, nor when I touched it with my own hands._{And then... the overwhelming feeling. I would die for him in an instant, there is no thought required, no hesitation. Who would have thought that love is so easy, so plain, so easily established between those that belong, those of the same flesh and blood.}I understand my father in these last moons, I have come to a deeper appreciation for what he did for me. Always cold... but not when it mattered most, he saved my life and cared not for his. I wish I could thank him, wish I could tell him one last time, I understand... and thank you. I love you

Time's fleeting. What is the soul without the aether, what happened to my life? I feel as if there is no me without the us. What have you done to me? I did not know this was going to happen... I did not think it would be so severe. Now the bond we share runs deeper than blood, deeper than my soul. The world has shrunk to nothing and its place there is only you....
And when I dare forget, I am reminded of your presence every time my reflection stares back at me from the depths of the mirror world.

I have an obligation to save him. To our mother, our father... my brother is what is left of them in the world. If my life was worth his, I would lay it down for him. I know I will be called a coward, I know there is no appreciation... no understanding. I cannot even explain myself properly, so it is no wonder. So I commit my thoughts to these empty pages. Let them soak up my ink, there is no judgement here, only the soothing neutral silence of paper.The past has caught up with me, I thought this time it would be the end for certain. I got lucky and he plucked the short end of the straw. Luck was never on his side, I feel guilt for that.I will save him or perish, it is the most ungrateful task yet. For I know he will despise me even more. But he cannot ever hate me as much as I would myself if I did not try.

Pale eyes ask me why. I fear and loathe the desperation... and yet. To be without is agony.

I've noticed the change, even though I do not speak of it. He knows, he sees... He does not know I know deep down I must only reach out and accept. At least I think he does not.I fear there is no return now. Nothing will ever be normal again, he took who I was and he murdered it and I let him.. A life for a life.

This time there is no place I can run to. This time what I have done is permanent.Nothing, absolutely nothing will save me now, the only way out is death and it may never come.Faced with the choice of eternal bond or self imposed death, I find myself lacking the will and ability to choose the latter. And so I remain... to see if the prison I find is the prison I wanted all along.I belong.But did I pay too steep a price. There is no telling where it will end. If.. .when.. I cannot shake the feeling he will hurt me, strip everything I have, everything I am... until we are one at last and forever. While part of me finds peace in that thought the other is terrified.It paralyzes me. And yet I know running will solve nothing. And so I stay, adore the peace while it lasts.

Where there was only anger, there is calm now. I belong for better or for worse. What is love but a cruel mistress... always longed for, never what we expect and always full of pain.I realize I am not powerless, pain goes both ways.

...And yet I hope he still cares. He put me above himself once and I cling to it like a fool. Brother, has the war taken not only your leg and sense but your heart too? I pray for you and yet you wish me dead for nothing but your own vanity. If you could only say it to my face so I'd find it easier to believe it.I never asked for this war.... I've never asked for anything from you and the only thing you care to give me is your contempt.

We're but a mere shell of flesh directed by our every whims.

You did not deserve what I brought upon you. I am death to all who behold me, what remains that I can hold onto? The pain can't be measured in words, the debt cannot be measured in blood. I walk this life upon the ashes of those who came before me. Is it a blessing or a curse I will have to keep walking until time ends and swallows what remains of existence?I cannot outrun this cursed fate. There is no place left to hide. I question often whether this fate is worse than death and yet how can I question the purity of one so innocent? Flesh of my flesh, blood of my blood, I will stay and endure for you. One day you may see me for who I am and despise my presence, but until then you shall know love.

All that remains is fear.

Song reference....

House Heroux

Looking into their history will heed one a very long and boring list of relations. Ending lastly with Lord Sebastien de Heroux, his wife the Lady Armandine, and three children. Two sons, Jules & Lauriel and a daughter Fabienne (deceased).They are related by blood and marriage to House Beremont, which is far larger and more powerful than House Heroux could ever be. Beremont have held the western border against Dravania for at least seven centuries while the Dragonsong War lasted. They inherit a sizeable defensive structure called "The Black Keep". It sits atop the mountain range that divides the Western Coerthan Highlands from Dravania and overlooks the Dravanian Forelands on the western side and the lands of Beremont on the eastern side. The Beremonts rule over a port city called Berheim, along with warfare it is their main source of income and valiantly defend against invaders from inside and outside. The current Viscount de Beremont, Diedioux, is Lauriel's first cousin and childhood nemesis.Over ten years ago
The Church seized the entire Heroux Estate due to claims of heresy. Rumour has it, Lauriel de Heroux and his lover one Gabriel Fletcher had been found consuming the blood of Dragons.
Gabriel was burnt at the stake after he confessed under torture. Lauriel managed to escape such justice, aided by his father. Then the frost came, wreaking havoc on their already declining economy. Many perished, including the Viscount and his wife. The only townstead on the Heroux estate, a village by the name Crowestone soon became a living graveyard. The eldest son Jules, as well as the young Fabienne, fled to Ishgard after their families' excommunication from the Church. Jules devouted his life to fighting in holy war, only to return a cripple.Two years ago
At a whim Lord Ovont de Durendaire purchased the derelict landholdings of Heroux. The rebuild of the village was going splendidly until Jules de Heroux, eldest of the Heroux heirs got involved. Through cunning and luck Jules managed to snatch the landholdings back from Lord Ovont. Jules reinstated himself as Viscount Heroux and the lands were back within the family.Jules, a man of malicious nature and an uncanny aura, ruled Crowestone with an iron fist and aimed to shape it to his vision. Described by many as unpleasant company, his goal was to draw as many followers to his ranks as he could. For that he rallied those who believed the war with Dravania should continue until it was won in Ishgard's favour. He sowed rumours about Lauriel, painted him as a menace who consorted with Dragons and was leading an army against him.The few unlucky souls that traded with Crowestone reported a strange piety having taken a hold of the town. A new priest had been installed and along with the puppet Alderman and the Viscount himself their trinity held the town in a stranglehold of righteous piety.Such is was their vigour that they openly spoke out against Ishgard's new Dragon friendly policies.Recent History
The other Lords of the North soon lost patience with Jules' posing and shameless warmongering. And after many months of campaigning against him, Ishgard saw it fit to act. Jules' trial was one of principle. He was made an example of, to show the strength, unity and might of Ishgardian justice. He was sentenced to trial by combat and lost.Unfortunately, after his trial, rumour has it that he committed suicide in his prison cell. And thus ended the shameful reign of Jules de Heroux. He left behind a wife and child.The lands of Heroux have since been put under the jurisdiction of House Beremont and all who are descendants of the Heroux bloodline will henceforth carry the name Heroux de Beremont.The Viscount de Beremont has taken the hand in marriage of Jules' widow and accepted her newborn child as his heir. This consolidates his position as Lord over the Heroux domain and ensures that it will remain under Beremont control for future generations.He has further entangled Lauriel in his web, making him a vassal to his House and thus ensuring that Lauriel remains loyal or face legal consequences.

House Beremont